Prom & Mo Prom

 Xander celebrated his 18th birthday at Prom!  The theme was 007 and I thought he looked dashing in his tux.  He went with a bunch of friends and his friend Brianna was kind enough to come over and take a few pictures with him so I could commemorate the moment.  He said he had a blast and didn't come home until the wee hours of the morning.

A few weeks after that was Mormon Prom.  He asked his friend Tre to go with him.  I must say I was really impressed by this girl!  She was outgoing and beautiful inside and out.  I loved her dress.  They went to dinner, the dance and then to a friends house to hang out. 

Graduation

 My dad used to say that when you were a child Christmas came once every 2 years but when you were an adult it comes once every 6 months.  Time is a funny thing.  I remember sleepless nights that lasted forever, yet here I am, the mother of a high school graduate.  It's humbling to look at my son and be so proud and know that he is amazing in spite of my failings as a mother.  I will always have the feeling deep in my soul that I could've and should've done better. 

Sunday, May 22, 2016 was Seminary Graduation.  There was a time (many times) that I thought he wouldn't graduate from seminary.  But he did and he was asked to speak at the graduation.  He spoke about desire and how we learn based on our desire.  It was a wonderful talk, beautifully written and delivered.  He doesn't like to hear it but Xander is a born orator.  He is clear, concise and engaging and so honest in his words and delivery. 

 Tuesday was Graduation.  We had a get together at the house for him and for Michael.  There was a good turn out and it was nice to celebrate these two cousins who have reached this milestone together. 

 Xander worked hard and graduated with High Honors.  I was so proud that he graduated from Chandler High - my alma mater.  GO WOLVES!

 It was a gorgeous night - slightly breezy and cool.  I remember my high school graduation as hot and stifling so we all felt blessed by the weather. 

 Both Michael and Xander graduated with High Honors.  I'm so happy they graduated together from the same school.

Many people have asked me, "What are his plans?" "Where is he going to school?" "Is he going on a mission?"  I think after 13 years of schooling it's ok not to know what comes next.  I know Xander has ambitions and dreams and goals.  As much as I want him to do certain things, it's ok if he doesn't. 

It's his life to live. I'm proud and excited to be a part of it.

Youth Conference & a Pizza Party

 This weekend was Youth Conference.  Neither of my boys have ever been so of course I made them go. Xander was especially unhappy about this but I am so glad he went obediently.  He has been so obedient lately and I am grateful.  I think they had a good time but neither will admit it.  Christy sent me the following 2 photos and she sent me a video of everyone singing Happy Birthday to Xander. 

The conference was overnight in Flagstaff so Ian promised the little boys a pizza party.  On the way to get the pizza Max told me that it was his dream to eat pizza out of the box on his bed.  So of course we let him and Evan do just that.  We aren't dream killers over here. 

I love my boys.

Xander turns 17

On Thursday Xander turned 17. In a lot of ways I feel like we have grown up together since he was my first one.  I have made so many mistakes with him, but when I see the man he is becoming it's easy to see everything I have done right.  He is smart, driven, funny, hard working...and so much more.  He has been working for grandpa (my dad) for a few months, helping to get their home ready to sell.  In that time he has saved most of his money and plans on investing it.  Lately he has been reading a lot of investment books and books like "The Four Hour Workweek" and "Rich Dad, Poor Dad".  I promised I would read The Four Hour Workweek after I finish the Mistborn series. 

Last week he sent me this text:

It came at the perfect time.  I am so thankful for Xander and the light he is in my life. 

We had

these Tom Ford sunglasses forever at my work.  We stopped carrying the line and cut the price in half and they still didn't sell.  Finally one of my bosses said I could have them!  So I gave them to Xander.

 He makes them look good.

 I have so many ups and downs with this kid.  He can be frustrating in one instance and hilarious in the next.

My mom pointed out that he is alot like his father.  True words have never been spoken.

Working has made me a much more patient mom.  I can't waste my time getting frustrated or mad at the little things.  It has helped my relationship with Xander.  I understand him better.

And even though he likes to drive me crazy...he is awesome.  I'm lucky to call him mine.

Alexander turns 14

This year Xander wanted a low-key birthday.  The weekend before his birthday we had Joe and Michael over for pizza and they stayed up late eating junk food and playing video games in Xander's room.  The next day I took those boys, along with a few other of Xander's friends to the mall.  Then I went and picked up another friend and paid for them all to go see a movie.  I took a picture but for the life of me I can't find it!

oh, well.

On his actual birthday I made him his favorite cake, ordered pizza again and we sang to him.  He is such a great kid.  I love being his mom.

13

Having a teenager is hard. And I've only had one for 4 days. I'm wondering how the next 7 are going to go.

On April 16th Xander turned 13. In case we forgot it was his birthday, he reminded us numerous times. He used the birthday card to get us to take him fishing, get him donuts and take him out to dinner. Ian took him fishing and I think combined they caught about 75 fish. And son and father bonded. It was awesome.

Favorites:

food: spaghetti or any type of fish
music: The Format, All American Rejects, Travis & Guster
thing to do: basketball or swimming
color: red

I am having a party for him this Friday which I am more than a little nervous about. Say a prayer that I survive!

My son

is growing up. He is walking that thin line between being a child and being a teenager. As he gets older he takes on and accepts more responsibility. And he loves it. He loves being in charge and he loves people depending on him. Where did he come from?

He hates disappointing me. For weeks he has been preparing me for his grades. Telling me off and on that he may be getting a B in this class or a C in that class. When we got his report card (one B, the rest A's) I knew I had to make a big deal about how awesome he did-because he had been so stressed out about letting me down, I wanted him to know how proud we were (and are) of him. I also told him that as long as he does his best and tries his hardest, I will be proud of him.

Last week we took a ride together in the car. He was having a sad day and confided in me about some things going on. I listened and gave him the best advice that I could think of - that we are responsible for our own happiness. We can get sad about things or feel left out or mad, but a positive attitude can make all the difference. I told him how I struggle with being sad and feeling helpless. The things that help me the most are reading my scriptures and praying and thinking about all of the things I have to be thankful for. And sometimes crying on Ian's or my mom's shoulder. I told him I would always be there for him.

Saturday I took him fishing. I sat looking at the lake, watching my son cast into the water - periodically coming over to update me on the status of his casting. And I thought about how lucky I am to be his mother. And how even though he is growing up, I am glad we are on this journey together.

times 2

The other night we went on our yearly visit to Organ Stop Pizza in Mesa. We go every December for Michael's birthday. When we were there, I couldn't help but notice how much Evan and Joshua love being together. It kind of reminds me of two other boys I know....

And speaking of Xander and Michael, guess who got the leads in the 6th grade play? That's right! The school is doing Bugsy Malone. Both Alexander & Michael's classes will do a production of it. I was so excited when Alexander told me that he got the role of Bugsy (he had been preparing for his audition by practicing monologues and singing for weeks). And even more excited when he told me Michael got the part of Bugsy in his class! They can't wait to rehearse and practice their lines together.

We have been listening to the soundtrack in the car - I love it! I can't wait!

Bugsy - x2!

*Note - the red thing on Alexander's teeth are his braces - he got red and yellow braces in honor of ASU and the Washington Redskins :)

Tidbits

-Yesterday I was able to go in and help Ben's class make gingerbread houses with their "buddies". Their buddies are kindergarteners. I loved seeing Ben help his buddy make his house before Ben even started on his. It made me proud to have a son who is happy to help others.

-When I was walking the halls at the boys' school I saw a lot of art work on the walls. I was able to find a picture that Max painted showing perspective - a road leading into a bunch of trees. I continued on and caught a glimpse of a beautiful landscape (think Bob Ross). I looked and saw that Alexander had painted it. I almost teared up I was so proud. I'm so glad that the boys go to a school where all parts of their brains are learning :).

-Kneeling in family prayer, Max looked around and said, "Wait - our circle isn't complete because Dad isn't here." Even though he can't be home as much as he would like, my boys really love and admire their dad (so do I).

-Evan's new phrase is: "pretty please?" The sad thing is - it works.

While I'm speaking of Evan - he is still prone to throwing fits when we go places. It's really bad. I've tried: suckers, binkys, positive rewards...nothing works. He screams and screams when he doesn't get his way. Any suggestions?

Soccer, an "incident" and Serranos

Today marked the end of soccer. WOOHOO! It's not like I haven't enjoyed it - I have. But seriously, it's December and I want to sleep in on Saturdays.

Brief recap:

At Max's final game he accidentally "headed" the ball. Kahea got it on video - it was awesome! I told her to post it on youtube. They won! Max loves to win. After the game the coach handed out trophies and we ate these Little Debbie Christmas cakes that are now the Trezise family favorite.

At Ben's game they finally played a team that gave them a run for their money. It was close and very stressful but they won! During the game there was an "altercation" with Evan and Max in which Max "allegedly" threw Evan down on his head. Ian "supposedly" witnessed this and went over to beat I mean punish Max. Max was so upset, so of course he started screaming at Ian (we are such a spectacle wherever we go). Ian started to go towards Max to calm him down and Max screamed, "You've got 5 seconds to get your yellow-bellied keester off my property!" Veins were popping out of his forehead. Luckily he didn't see me laughing so hard I almost wet my pants.

Alexander's team played their arch enemy's yet again. The team won with a penalty shot - which was very upsetting and not fair. I'm pretending Xander's team won - because they were the better team and played clean.

Afterwards we went to Serranos with my mom and Kim, Brian and Joe. We ate our fill of chips, salsa, beans, rice & sopapillas. Alexander celebrated soccer being over by ordering the most expensive thing on the menu (garlic shrimp) and daring everyone to eat a really hot pepper. Ian was the only sucker who took that dare. We had a really nice time - we didn't have to yell at the kids even once. It was an exhausting but nice way to spend the day.

P.S. I forgot my camera today but when Kim posts pictures I'll steal them from her blog and post them here. Stay tuned...

I heart soccer

Many of you know that Alexander had the chance to go fishing with my dad and my uncle David on Saturday. I thought it would be ok for him to go until I heard that his soccer coach had told Ian that he needed Alex to play in the game that Saturday because they were playing the only team that has defeated Alex's team. And last year when Alex guarded their star player he totally shut him down (the player's dad came up to our coach after the game and told him that no one had been able to shut out his son - until Alex).

So Alex played on Saturday. Holy cow it was an action packed game (I wish you had been here for this game, Mandie). The opposing team played really dirty - lots of tripping, shoving, strong arming. The player Alexander was guarding got a yellow card. He was so frustrated because Alex was on him like glue! I overheard our coaches talking - the head coach said, "Look how frustrated #9 (the player Alex was guarding) is! Alex is totally shutting him down!" I was so proud of our team - we played a clean game and we won! It was AWESOME! I'm so glad both Ian and I could be there to see it.

I love soccer. And even though I thought I'd never say it, I think I might love it more than baseball. We are so proud of Alex!

In other soccer news: Ben and Max won their games. Ben always wins his games, but it was the first time Max's team has won. They did awesome! The final score was 6-1. Yeah!

P.S. Thank you Rayna for the picture :)

Drama

I was moody today. I hate it when I'm moody. I try not to be but then I just get irritated that I can't stop being moody. My poor boys - they just don't understand female hormones. Part of my moodiness is because I'm worried. Alexander is really unhappy. This is causing friction at home and stressing me out. Fishing is the only thing that seems to make him happy.

Part of it is his appearance. His front teeth are crooked and the dentist doesn't want us to go to an orthodontist until most of his baby teeth have fallen out (he still has alot to lose). He sometimes gets teased at school and I know it's wearing on his self esteem. Plus there are some girls at school who are just plain mean. Luckily he has alot of guy friends who stick up for him.

Anyway, today as we were driving home from soccer practice Alexander started telling me about Drama class. I love when we are alone in the car together and we talk - just the two of us. I also love that he takes Drama at his school. He loves it too. Today they did an exercise that involved them being characters and acting in different situations. He said that after his group went the drama teacher took him aside and told him, "Alex, you are a natural! You should really be in Improv". That one comment made his day. It's amazing to me how kind words and compliments can make someone's day.

When he told me that story, just hearing the happiness in his voice made my day. It reminded me to look for the positive in what my children do - and to compliment them on it.

To build them up instead of tearing them down.

This

is what happens to your hair when you take a shower and then go to bed with a fan blowing in your face.

I think he should wear it to school like that. Just because.

Also, proof that fall does exist in Arizona:

Buckle up...this is a long one

Today started off with me making sunflower cakes (yes, you read that right) and my family asking what the horrible smell was. I was making them because today was also Multi-Cultural Day at the boys' school. Ben's class studied Native American cultures and his teacher wanted to have a food table with samples of different Native American foods. Hence the sunflower cakes. I also made pumpkin raisin cookies (which smelled much better than the cakes).

After making the cakes, I quickly slapped on some make up and clothes and ran down to the school to see Alexander's group do their presentation on Meso America. It was so interesting and dynamic - those boys were hilarious! They even did a small commercial during their presentation about ritual knives. It cracked me up! Thanks to Adam who babysat so my mom could come too.

Then I went back home and attempted to get a little work done. An hour later I went back to the school to bring in the sunflower cakes and pumpkin cookies for Ben's class. This one mom, Emily, organized the whole food table - it was wonderful! She found creative and appetizing foods to make and display. I had to leave before the kids got to eat but when I came back later, Kahea (who also slaved in the kitchen making beans and squash) said it was a huge success!

I love the happy look on Kahea's face in this picture

I quickly ran to pick up lunch at Elmers for my mom and dad and then ran home. I got a little bit of work done, and then went back to the school to be a docent for Alexander's class. This meant that I got to take a group of kids around to the different classes to see what they did. My favorites were Japan (the kids got to make oragami and hats), Egypt (the kids made these AWESOME pyramids out of food), Native America and America (Max's class). It was such a wonderful and enriching way to spend my day. Plus I got to hang with my homies - that's always a fun thing!

My cousin's little girl - this is the look she gave me when I told her to smile

Thomas - all dressed up as an early American settler

Xander checking out the reports in Ben's class

I loved when each time Max saw me he would run up to me and give me a hug. And Ben would come over and talk to me. Alexander was having a bit of a rough day (some punk girls in his class were rude to him) but he told me afterward how happy he was that I was there.

My mom watched Evan most of the day so that I could go. She is such a trooper! When I came to pick him up I asked if she wanted a drink (we were going to Sonic) and she said a whiskey would be great! I guess Evan really wore her out.

Tayler's class is studying Egypt and this week they did a wax museum. Tayler was an Egyptian Goddess. She's was awesome. And looked beautiful.

It's so fun for me to watch kids learn and be creative at the same time. I love it! And now my kids are on break - I'm so excited not to have a schedule for the next 2 weeks! Woohoo!

Michael flexing his muscles. He's quite the ladies man :)

Soccer & Sweat

No, your eyes are not deceiving you. That's Ben. RUNNING. Those of you who know Ben know how unusual it is for him to run or to move fast in any sort of way. He is on a team this year where he knows no one. And because of that he has to pay attention. And move. Quickly. When Ian and I saw him jump up in the air and stop the ball we almost passed out. Because Ben is usually the one on the field biting his fingernails. Or staring off into space. He played awesome in his first game - his team won 7-0.

We had 3 soccer games on Saturday (2 at the same time) so I brought a kiddie leash for Evan. And I'm not ashamed to say I used it. Max had so much fun with that leash. He especially liked holding it while Evan was strapped in it.

Max had a great time playing on Saturday. He is so aggressive! I don't know why I'm surprised. It was so stinkin' hot though. I sweated (is that a word) so much that one woman asked me if I peed my pants. I think she was joking, but it still hurt my feelings. I can't help how much I sweat! Tiffany has a theory that the more you exercise the more you sweat. So even though I've gained 8 pounds since Christmas, I still exercise all the time. Which would explain the vast amounts that I sweat, if you believe Tiffany's theory (which I do).

This is Xander sitting on the sidelines of Ben's game, critiquing Ben's performance. At one point Ian mentioned that Ben needs to kick the ball harder. Xander jumped up and showed me how hard and far he can kick the ball. I didn't get to go to Xander's game (I was too busy peeing my pants at Max's game) but Ian said Xander did awesome. Even his coach commented on it. They won, which is all that matters in Xander's book.

Having 3 soccer games during the heat of the day really wore us all out. Especially Evan. He fell asleep eating his lunch.

I think it's going to be a great season!

Uh-oh

Everyday when I go through Max's backpak I throw some of his papers away. There is just too much for me to keep it all. I only keep things with exceptional coloring or writing. Lately he has been making books at school. His favorite book that he has made has been his caterpillar book. He treasures it and carries it every where (it is pretty great). Yesterday when I found a fire safety book in his backpak I tossed it. Big mistake. Later he asked me if I'd seen the book that he brought home. I immediately cringed. I knew exactly where it was. I ran to the trash to dig it out. Luckily, I managed to find it unscathed. I don't even want to think about what would've happened if I couldn't find the book.

In other news:

My oldest son now spends his mornings IMing (is that the correct way to say it?) kids in his class. Usually I pretend I'm cleaning something in the computer room so I can read what he's writing. He hasn't caught on to me yet.

Last week, despite MANY warnings from me, Ben procrastinated doing his homework and consequently was up late Tuesday night trying to finish (it's due Wednesday). One of the assignments in his homework pack is to write 10 sentences using 2 of his spelling words in each sentence. Last week most of his spelling words were contractions. One of his sentences was: "Shouldn't and couldn't both have n't in them." SERIOUSLY. Don't worry, I made him write most of his sentences over.

Evan and I almost came to blows yesterday. But we didn't and then we ended the day snuggling and watching Top Chef. It's all good.

Still obsessed

He caught the fish with his bare hands.

Alexander is still addicted to fishing. Ian has been taking him every weekend. Except for this weekend. I had to take Xander to Urgent Care yesterday because he had a high fever (he has strep). He was stressed out that we wouldn't get back in time for him to watch the Bass Fishing Championship. I'm not kidding.

He is constantly researching online the best places to go. I love that he is so passionate about something but on the otherhand I can only take so much fish talk. You know?

It's times like these that I do wish I had a girl. Or at least someone who likes Project Runway, baking, shopping and Justin Timberlake...

Deaf Ears

It happened again. Xander and Ian sat down one Sunday afternoon a few weeks ago and watched Poltergiest. Again. (you might have remembered when I first posted about this in June 10, 2007). I hate that movie. And I haven't even seen most of it. As they were nearing the end of the movie it was bed time and I was herding the other boys to bed but of course there was lots of, "Why can't I stay up and watch the movie?" so I said fine, as long as you don't come crying to me when you are scared. 10 minutes later Xander, Ben and Max were all scared and crying. The movie was over and Ian's taunts had begun. He did "crazy, scary clown face" to Ben and Max and kept moving the Woody doll in Xander's room. I hid in the study, burying my face in some book.

2 weeks later and we are still feeling the aftermath of Poltergiest. Last night Xander started crying because once again Ian was making "crazy, scary clown face" and he was too scared to go to sleep. Then I had to go down to my parents' house to take my dad something so as I went outside and got on my bike I sensed something behind me - and there was Ian running after me, with that look. I think I called him an ass. I know! when I get scared all sorts of inappropriate remarks escape from my mouth. He almost gave me a heartattack.

I get back and Xander has calmed down. I remind him that I told him not to watch the movie. And that it's stupid to watch something you know will freak you out. But as usual, no one listens to me.

and yes, Ian does get some kind of perverse joy out of scaring his wife and children.

Crime & Punishment

Everybody knows my dad loves to hunt. I grew up eating venison and elk. And I loved it. Even though my dad hunted he always taught me to respect animals. When I was young we had horses, cows, goats and chickens that we helped care for. He never killed an animal for sport or fun. We always ate whatever he brought home from his hunting trips.

For Christmas Alexander wanted an air soft rifle. That was all he wanted. Nothing else. Alex is an extremely responsible kid. He gets good grades, does chores, babysits and is a big help around the house. So we bought him the rifle and Christmas morning Ian took him outside and showed him how to use it.

Yesterday my mom called me and asked, "Did you know Alexander is outside shooting at birds with his rifle?" Maybe some of you think this is a normal boy activity or you might think that something like this is bound to happen when you buy a boy a gun. I was horrified. I never for one second thought he would shoot at anything other than rocks and tin cans and other things Ian told him it was safe to shoot at.

Xander came home 5 minutes later and I calmly asked him if he'd been outside shooting at birds. Boy, the look on his face. Guilt. He KNEW it was wrong. He admitted that he had been shooting at birds. As mad as I was at him, I was happy he told me the truth. I immediately confiscated his gun and bullets and told him how disappointed I was.

So today Xander and I are going to sit down today and discuss his punishment.

Any thoughts?